My journey into painting - Part 2

My journey into painting - Part 2

I suffered from insomnia for years, not permanently but in persistent recurring phases. Somehow I never had the feeling to be on the right way, although I was considered a successful scientist, well functioning. I thought that‘s how life is and cannot be changed. Nobody is happy all of the time and of course life also does mean fighting. Keep going! Be grateful for whatever path you are on, give your all and simply make the best out of it! In spring 2012 I was out of the battle with burnout eventually and in ambulatory treatment at a psychologist. Within a few weeks I had told him my life story and he asked me what I actually expect from our sessions. I answered, that I hoped for a little help to be fully functioning again and get back to work soon. He (in my own words): „No. You are here to rediscover that your life is an incredible pool of possibilities in the first place. It‘s a beautiful variety of options and you will learn the great pleasure of the power to choose.“ I began to think about his words. It was more a playful thinking about my dreams and possibilities, not a specific search of a completely new direction for my whole life. But then I came across paintings while surfing the internet. Paintings just as I had seen them in San Francisco. All of the sudden this wasn’t game anymore and I started searching frantically. I have never consciously thought about becoming a professional painter, never weighted the pros and cons as it is usually done before an important decision. I was simply decided - ad hoc - from one day to the next. I found answers to my all my questions within one night. Can I learn painting from scratch to a professional level at the age of 42? Are there role models for that? Online courses? Yes to all. And do I dare? I did not sleep that night, but with a unique excitement, better than making love. Okay I‘m bad at that 😄